May 6th is closer than you think

Ok, it's time for some more Sexy Beijing.  Since the Indiana primary is little more than a week away it's obviously on my mind and I still don't know who I'm going to vote for!  Maybe I should check in with the other side of the world...

This annoys me...but is it wrong?

Tom Cruise's son Connor to appear in film

In this Nov. 16, 2006 file photo, Connor Cruise, adopted son of Tom Cruise a...

15 hours ago

LOS ANGELES — The 13-year-old son of Tom Cruise is following in his father's footsteps.

Connor Cruise, the adopted son of Tom Cruise and ex-wife Nicole Kidman, has a minor, non-speaking part in the upcoming Will Smith drama "Seven Pounds," a spokesman for Columbia Pictures confirmed Tuesday.

 

                                 -OR-

SISTER'S CRUEL TAUNTS DRAW TEARS FROM ADOPTED DAUGHTER

DEAR ABBY: I'm 12 and adopted. I have always known and have never felt less loved because of it. My mom always said that when you're adopted, you know that you are wanted and loved because nobody gets adopted by accident.

My 14-year-old sister, "Melissa," is our parents' natural child. We were always close, but lately she has decided to be mean to me and tries to hurt me by telling me that I'm not her "real" sister and our parents aren't my "real" parents. This hurts very much. If I cry, she thinks it's funny. She never says it in front of our parents -- she wouldn't dare.

Melissa used to tease me when we were alone in our room, but now she does it in front of her friends, who also laugh at me when I get upset and cry. Melissa would be in big trouble if I told Mom, but I'm afraid it will make her even meaner. I don't want to get her in trouble because, in spite of this, I still love her. I just want her to stop being mean and start treating me like her real sister again. Abby, what should I do? -- REAL SISTER IN TACOMA

DEAR REAL SISTER: Clip this and show it to "Miss Melissa." I have news for her. Parents who raise a child ARE "real" mothers and fathers. And you are as "real" a sister as Melissa is likely to get.

Her behavior is cruel, insensitive and immature. She's doing it because you have allowed her to get away with it. Give your sister one warning. Tell her that if she repeats that nonsense again, you will tell your "real" mother, who also happens to be HER mother. And if she's foolish enough to try it -- follow through.

 

Ok, it's me again.  I don't have children and I obviously am still waiting for MayLing to arrive so I don't know what it is like to parent adopted children, but for those that do, is it annoying when people make the differentiation between your adopted and biological kids?  I'm pretty sure it would bother me if someone introduced me as "Erica and her adopted daughter, MayLing".  She is my daughter regardless of how she comes to me and people will likely make one of two assumptions when they see us together as a family: either I adopted or I got knocked up by a man of another ethnicity. 

We know that Tom Cruise has 3 kids--the media may be whoring after the Suri story, but we still know that he has 3 kids.  Same with Nicole Kidman--we know she has 2 kids and 1 on the way.   And what about the Jolie-Pitt brood?  When their family is mentioned the media always differentiates by referring to their "3 adopted kids and Shiloh".  I copied this sentence from an online entertainment magazine:  The 32 year-old award winning actress and her heart-throb partner Brad Pitt have a multi-cultural brood consisting of Maddox, six, from Cambodia; Pax, three, from Vietnam; and Zahara, two, from Ethiopia as well as their own child, 17-month-old Shiloh.

Their own child?  Give me a break.  I'm sure if we asked them they would argue that point.  I'd like to think this only happened in the news, but it doesn't.  I recently read of one woman's experience when she visited a restaurant.  The waitress tried to argue that the woman's child was not her own because he was adopted from another country. 

Ugh.  I need to think of something good to say when uneducated people spout such things.  I don't want my child growing up with a complex--she'll have enough issues to deal with that this doesn't need to be one of them!

Who your baby mama?

I think this movie can go one of two ways...it can be seen as offensive to all us single mamas just trying to have families or it could actually be a sweet little movie about two women bonding through the baby process.  Having seen other Tina Fey movies, I'm betting it will be sweet, but funny.  I'm looking forward to seeing it and I really hope I'm not disappointed. 

I have another whole baby mama post ready to go, I've just been lazy about posting it. 

The stink eye

So, I think it is a bad sign when people see you and gasp and yell or shrink in horror and ask "your eye?  What happened to your eye??"  I work in healthcare so they either think I am under the influence of the devil or I have sort of hemorrhagic fever.  Either way, not good.  Yesterday the blood crossed half way across the eye, but I see today that the river of blood is receding.  Regardless, I've decided that it may be time to see the doctor.  It's happening with enough frequency and seems to occur when I am under stress so I definitely need to be taking better care of my stress levels.

I call the big one Bitey

Well, we had another one...another earthquake that is.  This is our third in 4 days and I have to admit, I'm a bit concerned.  We've had more earthquakes in the last 4 days than we have in over 20+ years.  This one hit at 1:38 AM and registered 4.5 on the Richter.  No new damage has been reported.  Once again, I did wake up, but I didn't know what woke me up.  Hopefully this is the last of it for a while. 

It's back!

So that was the beginning of the burst blood vessel in my eye.  That was last night.

And here is today...

The first two months of the year I had to deal with broken blood vessels in my other eye...and now this.  It may be time to seek help and keep a closer eye on my blood pressure since I know I have felt really stressed recently--not just work (which has been pretty awesome), but with a poor diet, too little sleep and too much caffeine. 

Ugh, I've got to stop looking at these pictures...it's making my eyes hurt.  

I feel the earth move under my feet

Yeah, so the "big one" hit at 5:36 AM Friday morning.  I'll be honest, I'm a deep sleeper and have slept through more than one tornado so I don't remember feeling it or hearing it, but something did wake me up at 5:38 (according to my clock).  I'll be honest, I wasn't sure what it was.  I do remember thinking that it was odd that the birds, which are normally screeching so loudly that carrying on a conversation outside is nearly impossible in the morning, were suddenly silent.  That was weird.  I rolled over and slept until my alarm went off half an hour later and they were playing, of all things, "I feel the earth move" by Carole King.  Yeah, classy stuff folks.

My mom was staying at my sister's house in Indy and she said it was strong enough to shake the furniture and said that it was probably the bed rocking that woke me up.  I know my cat was nowhere to be found.  That earthquake registered a 5.2 on the Richter scale.  According to mapquest, I am 110 miles from the epicenter. 

At 11:20 am I was sitting at a co-worker's desk and I could hear another staff member across the hall yell "earthquake!" and slam her phone.  Ricci was sitting across from me and suddenly grabbed her desk while we rocked and rolled.  They say it only lasted 10-20 seconds, but I timed it and the folders on the desk danced for 90 seconds.  Of course, sitting on the 4th floor probably gave me a better appreciation of the movement.  That one registered a 4.5 on the scale.  Evidently we are still having aftershocks and they will continue another 7-10 days.  I think that's probably true because my equilibrium has felt a bit off.

I think we may have had another aftershock this morning, because the cat came tearing into my room and starting pawing at the window and shaking the blinds and howling.  I've never seen her act like that.  She came back a few minutes later and did it again until I yelled at her to knock it off.  

Of course, I think the funniest thing is this: Yeah, that was the headline on the "green" section of the paper when I woke up yesterday.  Of course, the funniest part of that is the fact that the paper had probably been sitting in my drive way before the quake hit. 

Other random facts:

• Friday's quake took place on the 102nd anniversary of the devastating 1906 San Francisco earthquake. 
• Because our bedrock is different than California's bedrock, our quakes are different.  Researchers are unsure if yesterday's quake was a result of the New Madrid quake line (in Missouri) or the Wabash Valley Fault system (which is where my parent's live in southeast IL).
• Because our bedrock is more compact than CA, our quakes can be felt more intensely for a greater distance.  Yesterday's quake could be felt in Kentucky, Missouri, and Wisconsin even though the epicenter was in south-eastern Illinois. 
• A major earthquake in the Wabash Valley nearly 200 hundred years ago registered over a 7.0 on the Richter scale and was quite devastating.  It reversed the direction of the Wabash River (and the Mississippi) and rang church bells in Boston.
• I grew up in the Wabash Valley and was 20-30 miles from the epicenter in 1987.  It was not as strong as yesterday's quake, but I do remember it.
• The last strongest earthquake along the Wabash Valley Fault system was in 1968 and it was a 5.3.
• The quakes in this area usually register between 4-5 on the Richter and are considered moderately strong.  They used to occur every 10 years, but the last one recorded was in 2002. 
• Because I lived on an active quake line growing up, my school would have "earthquake drills".  We were told that some day the "big one" would hit and we'd likely die (well, they might not have said it quite like that, but that's the general impression I got from it).
• If you like you-tubing as much as I do, you will see some interesting earthquake predictions.  One was posted days before the quake and claimed it would occur on the 18th or 19th, but in California.  The other way claimed a lot more information, but since it was posted the day of the quake, it loses points for validity.

Evidently there were signs hours before it hit that something was brewing.  Several people reported "knocking" sounds several times during the night, my mom was one of these people.  Others reported that before both quakes their dogs, cats, birds, gerbils, rats, etc started making noise and behaving strangely.  We have a very large seismograph in town--so why were none of us notified of the impending earthquake?  This thing is so sensitive that it can read storm activity from the East coast. 

And for your viewing pleasure:

Whole lotta shakin' goin' on

This has to be a first for me--how many mornings have you been awoken by an earthquake?  Yeah, well I felt one this morning!  How many Hoosiers can normally claim that.  I can sleep through a tornado, but anything that makes me feel dizzy wakes me up.  Go figure. 

So you like stress, eh?

Yeah, so I have always worked better under pressure.  It isn't entirely related to procrastination--a theory I disproved in college when I attempted to write a research paper early in the semester.  It sucked.  The next semester I went back to my usual technique of doing it the weekend (or week, if I got lucky) before it was due.  I don't know why, but my writing is definitely better.

I have a couple of things coming up this week.  I'm trying to get some reports written that are due by Friday and friends of mine are coming over to my house for the first time for dinner.  Eeek!  My house is a pigsty....I really should take photos.  So, I can wait until Thursday to clean or I can get started today.  Not only that, but I tend to spaz when I cook for friends for the first time.  I tend to think it needs to be some sort of gourmet, when I know that is not what they are expecting.  My friends are Indian (born and raised) and are requesting of all things....meatloaf.  That's about as far from gourmet as you can get, right?  Wrong.  Pampered Chef has a fancy meatloaf recipe.  Do I do that or do I just use my usually dumping of anything that sounds good?  I'm thinking I'll go with the usual...

Kroger at 9:30 pm

So, I was just at the grocery store a few minutes ago and I hear a young man say "Dan" or "ma'am" it was hard to tell between the allergy pressure in my ears and his redneck accent.  He approached me and we had the following exchange:

Him: My sister-in-law is pregnant and needs milk.  What kind do I get?

Me: (Blank look)

Him: Is it 1% or skim?

Me: Uh, probably not skim.  She needs vitamin D (totally pulling this out of my butt--OB was my least favorite part of school).

Him:  So that's 1%, right? 

Me: Yeah.

I had two problems with this exchange:

1. I can't drink milk so it has been years since I have bought any.  I haven't a clue about milk anymore. 
2. He could have taken one look at the contents of my cart and realized that a woman that has a large box of cat litter and 1-serving boxes of Lean Cuisine and little yogurt cups does NOT have kids or likely been pregnant.  Look at my cart, not the size of my faux child-bearing hips. 

14 months....wow

I am just in awe that I have been waiting 14 months now for my daughter.  Wow.  I will wait as long as I have to wait until she is home--as I remarked to a friend who asked if I had thought of giving up, "how can I?  Her name is inked into my skin!"  Tattooing her Chinese name into my skin was to be a daily reminder of God's promise.  When I feel that I can't go on any longer, I am forced to see, to really see, that I must continue.  There are difficult days, but every LIDversery I am reminded once again of the miracle that is my daughter.  The miracle that God turned my heart at the exact moment he did, that he persisted in pushing me to keep going even when I fought him and argued that I couldn't be a single parent.  And I am reminded that even though she isn't yet here, my life has become richer because of her.  How can I possibly give up?  I can't and I won't.  And while I know she isn't yet here, I want to give a shout out to the heavens on her behalf--happy day, baby girl!  Mama loves you!

Silver Linings

Most of you know I have a twisted sense of humor--it's not meant to be mean-spirited, but I think people that don't know me don't know this. 

Most of you remember being a kid and being made fun of for a variety of reasons--your front teeth fell out too soon or too late, you were too tall or too short...anything kids found to make fun of you they used.  Unfortunately, that mentality still thrives in many American adults and it is really disturbing.  Many times at work I turn to a co-worker and say "what grade are you in?" or "what grade is she in?"  Their behavior is just that juvenile. 

I found this story in the paper, and it caught my eye so I thought I would attach the on-line version:

Gurinder Osan of the Associated Press took these photographs of an Indian baby today at her family's home in Saini Sunpura, India.

No, your eyes aren't playing tricks on you. This infant, a girl named Lali, has four eyes, two noses and two mouths.

"When I saw my daughter for the first time I was afraid of her but when the doctor said that aside from her two faces she was a normal child I accepted her," the girl's mother, Sushma, tells IANS.

Now villagers are lining up to see the baby that many view as a reincarnation of a Hindu goddess.

"God has made her like this and we are lucky to be her parents," grandfather Brahm Singh tells IANS.

Wow, instead of hiding her away, the locals now consider her the re-incarnation of a Hindu goddess named Durga--a fiery deity with three eyes and many arms (thank God she doesn't have more than one set of arms!). 

When I was working on my undergrad in anthropology, I took a grad level course about Shamanism (covering all regions of the globe--even the US--think of church snake handlers).  Native Americans did not hide away people with schizophrenia--they were promoted as Shamans or other highly respected people in their culture.  Of course, when you have such a title you get a lot of one-on-one attention and care so I think these individuals were well cared for.  Many schizophrenics have amazing gifts and talents, but because of the medication to control the other symptoms they often are not able to be as productive.  I'm not advocating for no medication--just saying that different cultures revere things we consider to be abhorrent. 

What little quirky things make you strange, but are actually quite charming?

It's Monday in the Year of Me

I am not a woman who spends hours shopping for clothes or shoes.  Truth is, I have a hard time finding things that fit right and avoid that kind of shopping as much as possible.  But in the spring when the wind is right and I see a Lowe's or Home Depot....I admit, my eyes get a bit misty.  And once I am in the store I am like a kid in a candy shop--flowers, and vegetable gardens, and cleaning supplies, and closet organizers...well, I could go on and on.  But this is what I really want.  It's what I have been dreaming about for 2 years now...my very own grill. 

No, not those grillz

I want this grill, sucka. It ain't fancy.  To be honest, it's about the cheapest one they carry, but think of the possibilities. 

What do you know...

I was quite irritated when I checked Fifth Third's online bank site and learned that the account had NOT been closed and that I was assessed an additional charge of $100+.  What the heck?  These people are really pissing me off.  So, I wrote them to complain.  Twice.

This is the response that I got from one of the emails:

April 5, 2008
Dear Erica,
Thank you for choosing Fifth Third Bank. We apologize for this situation and are committed to meeting your expectations. The -$100.53 is the amount of the overpayment on the account. These funds will be refunded to you in the form of a refund check in 10 business days.
Thank you again for informing us of your concerns and the opportunity to respond to this issue.

Huh...what do you know.  I'm still not satisfied with the response on why the account wasn't closed, but hopefully that will soon be resolved as well.

Finally, some rest

Sorry, for my hiatus blogger buddies. As you probably noticed I have been griping about being tired for a while. It wasn't until this week when the sweats started that I realized that it wasn't strictly fatigue related to work or travel, although that did play a part. Unfortunately living in B-town has re-activated some dormant allergy problems. The first year I was here I ran to my doctor that fall and again in the spring complaining of extreme fatigue, night and day sweats (no, not TB) and overall feeling of malaise. Something wasn't right, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I would have fevers and then be normal. We did a lot of tests and my WBC and Sed rates would be elevated during these times and not during other times of the year. It wasn't for another year that I realized it was probably a result of allergies. Although I get a bit of the watery eyes and sneezing, the fatigue and fevers is what puts me down.

So, I asked my boss for Monday off and I'm hoping between now and then that the season makes up it's mind. We are 3 weeks into spring and a good 15-20* below normal temp. We keep going back and forth between warming up and freezing--just make up your mind already! At least my weeds are greening up and my trees are starting to show hints of buds. I'm so excited! It's my favorite time of year, even if I do feel crappy.

• It's been a crazy, stressful, busy week. I have worked between 10-12 hour days all week so when I went into work this morning I only needed to work 45 minutes and then I would be in overtime. I ended up working 2 hours and I'm hoping my boss doesn't freak out. I did notify her in advance. I am so looking forward to having one day this weekend where I can sleep in and stay in my jammies all freakin' day. No kidding. I've spent this evening (after napping 3 hours) watching TV and crocheting. Ahhh, heaven.
• Big phat congrats to those families that received referrals today! Whoo-hoo! I think the CCAA cleared through 4 or 5 days of referrals, right? I think it went from January 4th through January 9th, 2006. I have to admit, since the CCAA took down the page with the log in dates and review by dates, I honestly don't obsess on it anymore. Although I still think of my MayLing, China and the adoption part of things don't enter my thoughts as much. I still read the China digital paper and I still cut out articles about China for her scrapbook, but I don't spend the time and energy on it like I did. I think some of that is good, but it is also sad as well. We haven't received an update for months about the review room. Kristen thought we may have gotten through it already, but who knows? I would certainly think so since there weren't any large groups between the last month cleared and our LID.
• I have excitedly been following Heather and Dustin's blog since I met them last summer when I visited Kristen in Wisconsin. At the time we teased them because they said they were open to either sex child. Well, they had a boy! And my goodness, he is the cutest boy I have EVER seen. I do have one thing to say, Dustin, let Heather hold him already!
• I just want to say one last thing about Fifth Third Bank--they suck. It's been a long, energy sucking battle the last few weeks to get to the bottom of some issues with my mortgage account. My parents are the best in the world and my dad offered insisted that I take a loan pay from him, and then pay my dad back each month...interest free. Considering that nearly 80% of each payment was going to interest, this is quite a gift. When I closed that loan account today they penalized me an additional couple hundred dollars. I didn't close a huge loan and it certainly wasn't my mortgage, so why do they need to do that? Not only that, when they handed me my statement they left a zero out...you know, those zeros are worth thousands of dollars. Thank goodness I caught it before they cashed it--that would have been disastrous. It gives me an ass cramp just thinking about it. With my neighborhood bank (which I should have gone to for my mortgage instead of being sweet-talked by an ass clown of a realtor) I have paid off two cars early and wasn't penalized. Anyway, they suck and if I could afford to pay for another closing, I would use my neighborhood bank. Really, not bitter, just a lot wiser about buying a home. Well, maybe still a teensy bit bitter.

Ok, I think that about sums things up for now. Congrats to all the new parents and to the rest of you, stay strong and know that your day will someday come.

And, yes, ass was my word of the day. Yesterday every e-mail I sent had the word awesome in it. Today, ass is reigning supreme.

Mama's tired

Mama's really tired.  I think all the travel, the respiratory infection I've battled the last few weeks and the crazy long hours I'm putting in COMBINED with the fact that I have only had 1 day one off in nearly 2 weeks has left me very tired.  I'm hoping to work a half day Friday and take Monday off. 

Hopefully I will be full of wit by then.  As you have probably noticed my posts have been rather irritable lately because I'm TIRED.  I did want to post Part III of My Baby's Daddy at some point and I'm dedicating it to Angie, but I'm sure all the singles out there will have a big fat "Amen!" to add after that post.