I realize I haven't updated this blog since February--wow. I decided until I actually have news about my daughter to post only to my son's blog. You can find us here, and yes, I do update it regularly with reflections on parenthood, lots of photos, and the emotions of being a new and single parent.
Hope I see you soon!
It was two years ago today that my dossier for my daughter in China was finally logged in. I remember the anxiety of the whole process--my 1600A paperwork had been misplaced and it was taking them a while to process my file. In some ways it was very similar to the wait for referral for my son and I guess waiting for my daughter prepared me for the grueling wait for his official referral.
I remember the anxiety of each day checking the mailbox until one day something came over me and instead of feeling defeated by the wait, I began to plan everything that needed to happen. I still had to visit the state capitol for the oh-so-precious state notarizations and because I couldn't leave anything to chance I decided to make the trek to Chicago to have the Chinese consulate authenticate and stamp everything. My friend Sherry was in on my plan and without 171H in hand we booked a hotel in Chicago and planned time off work.
And like I felt it would happen, on January 24th it arrived. Sherry and I took off at noon the next day and we shared an incredible little adventure that didn't end until Saturday evening when we drove down to my agency and personally delivered it on January 27th.
On February 2nd my dossier was en route to China and on February 12th I officially lined up between 44, 532 other people (ok, that's just a number I made up, but it sounds about right).
Since my son has come home people have assumed that I dropped the quest for my daughter. Nothing could be further from my mind. She was the one that began all of this and if not for her I would not have EVER attempted to bring home Spud.
She is still with me. In my heart, in my mind, and especially in my dreams. The dreams of her never ended and actually intensified after my referral for the Spud. Before I traveled I dreamed that once I got to Vietnam they tried to give me a 12 year-old girl and at first I didn't want her. I wanted my son! I kept trying to find a family for her and the entire time I searched for someone for her I found myself falling even more inexplicably in love with her. The last thing I remember is of the four of us--me on bottom, her, Spud and Siva the Cat all piled into a big recliner sleeping.
Yesterday morning another dream. The more recent dreams have been different--older than I thought or with a special need (I am not on the waiting child list because I think I have my hands full for now). This child, definitely one after my own heart for so many reasons, was still there.
In the dream my China agency had sent me a little gift for Spud with a note attached:
We have a referral, and we think she would be best with you. VSD repair with murmur. Born July 29, 2006. China is willing to waive the 12 month wait period between children or they will keep her for you until you are ready.
I am sure the dream has something to do with with feeling the 2 year mark creeping up on me, but after two years of waiting it is good to still have those moments when I feel close to her. Like she is still real even if she is only real to me.
Today I have to reflect on every thing that has occurred in the last two years. While my son has been a part of my heart as long as my daughter has, I never imagined that things would work out like this. As I write this I am looking down on his smiling face and marveling at it all again. Every little thing, every precious little second was perfectly measured so that we would be a family. It never ceases to amaze me that if I had waited one more day to make that decision, if CIS had been delayed by yet another day he wouldn't have been my son. Same goes if things had gone sooner--I might have been matched to another child.
So as I light a candle tonight and think of my daughter, I thank God that He put me on this path and that my daughter lead me right to my son. I think he will be a wonderful big brother some day.
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I received a surprising call this evening from Becky at 6:20 PM reporting that our story was being re-run in a different format. When I asked why I was told NBC was hoping to reach a different population than the Today Show because they received such positive feedback from the first show.
Months and months ago I mentioned to Becky how much I wanted to encourage others to adopt and to help other families through the process. Financially I can not help at this time (I haven’t had a paycheck since December—yikes!), but what I can do is educate every person that has an interest.
Last week I opened a facebook account for my son. Since then I have received a number of questions from others about the process, how did I do it as a single, and other more specific questions pertaining to adoption. It is a small thing, but I am so happy to help others who were in the same boat as I was. As a single person, adoption can be overwhelming. It’s not just jumping through the hoops. It’s the waiting, the unknown, and not always having a strong support system knowledgeable about adoption. People that haven’t adopted, haven’t waited and wondered if it would ever happen or worked against an impossible deadline can never understand what it is like. For singles I think it is doubly difficult (not that it isn’t hard for couples) because we don’t have that partner that can share the emotional burden.
I am glad that the original show touched people and I do hope more people will look into adoption. So many children need families and until I met my son I had NO idea how incredible being a parent could be.
I am going to break away from the usual love-fest that my blogs have become since my son has arrived and look at something that has me shaking my head, wincing, and wondering where it all went wrong.
Last week Nadya Suleman gave birth to 8 surprisingly healthy babies. I say surprisingly because it is a miracle all of them survived the pregnancy, but there is no way that they will leave the hospital without some sort of impairment as a result of being so premature. Many multiples suffer from CP, blindness, respiratory problems, etc. as a result of competing for adequate nutrition and oxygenation in the womb and being delivered early. It is very taxing to provide the necessary care for these children and I imagine that the first couple of years are the most difficult.
It is being reported that Nadya is angling to sell her story for $2 million and wants diaper sponsorship and wants to start a career as a TV child care expert. While I would normally be very hesitant to comment on any person’s choice to build a family, I feel her doctors should be held responsible in making some incredibly poor decisions. I am a single mom and I love my son, but he keeps me very busy. Nadya is a single, unemployed mom to 14 children under the age of 7, living in a 3 bedroom house with her parents (her mother has publicly come out and said her daughter is crazy and she is moving out).
Who is going to be taking care of these children? The better question is, who is going to be paying for these children? Currently the state of California is paying for the care of her previous 6 children. Since this story has come out the media love has cooled for Nadya. If she can’t secure some sort of TV sponsorship and sell her story, will California pick up the exorbitant cost of these special needs kids? Personally, I think the physicians should have some fiscal responsibility.
Obviously it sounds like Nadya has a few screws loose. The real icing on the cake is that she is in school right now studying to be a mental health counselor. No offense to my mother and others in her profession, but I think even they are aware that those that need the most help are often drawn to counseling. Usually schools are pretty good about recognizing these people and weeding them out.
However, I could be wrong. Perhaps Nadya will make a wonderful mother who will be able to bump Jon & Kate + 8 off TLC. Maybe she will receive enough endorsements to care for her children adequately and will be able to hire the necessary help to raise these kids. Maybe Ty Pennington and his building crew will build her a 15 bedroom home so they have room to grow. Maybe one of the schools there will waive tuition so her children can go to college some day. Maybe everything will work out and she will prove us all wrong. I certainly hope so for everyone’s sake.
Either way, I know one thing for sure. If Jon & Kate + 8 gives me nightmares, there is NO way I will ever watch Nadya + 14.
Because I have been so private about a lot of things in my life (believe me, it’s not limited to just the adoption) I have struggled with what is safe to put out there about me, but especially more now that the Spud has come into my life.
After much thought and consideration (and pleading from some people) I have decided to let you in another something in my life. My life and my son’s life are no longer so private.
Today Show--Cost of Adoption Segment
I looked at the greater good which is why I agreed to allow them to be a part of my son’s adoption story. I know that there a lot of people out there who want to adopt. When people have learned that I am adopting/have adopted I often hear “oh, I always wanted to do that, but it is too expensive”. It is expensive and it is difficult and it definitely heartbreaking somewhere along the way, but if we continue to follow that path, at the end there is usually a child that brings us unspeakable joy.
As a single woman, like so many of you reading this blog, things are not stacked in our favor. It is often more difficult to find an agency that will work with us. Since we are one income household it is difficult to find the money. I am not rich. I spend $200 per year on clothes/shoes/purses/accessories/etc. I don’t buy Starbucks unless it is bought for me. I don’t have cable TV and until I took a job that required a high speed internet connection I lived with dial-up. I don’t often eat out just as I don’t eat the sushi that I love unless it is a special occasion. As a single it is much more difficult to find organizations that give adoption grants or low/no interest loans. Believe me, I have looked. Most require a check box in the married box on the form and others also require families to follow a particular faith.
I feel very blessed that I stumbled across HelpUsAdopt.org and they were able to provide a handsome sized grant. Becky was certainly an answer to prayer. I remember stumbling across their website and seeing that the packet had to be in in only a few days or I wouldn’t meet the deadline. I remember writing the essay—pouring out everything that was on my heart, just in case. When I took the envelope off to the post office I had to pay a pretty penny to ship it overnight. I kissed the envelope goodbye and said a prayer expecting nothing.
Not only did I receive a grant, I got to be a part of something greater. I got to be a part of Becky’s dream to assist those of wanting to start a family—regardless of marital status, race, sexuality, religion, etc.
So, for any of you reading this I hope you will consider giving money to HelpUsAdopt.org and assisting this dream that will allow MORE families to adopt. And for those of you, like me, who had a dream but had difficulty finding the funds, please contact HelpUsAdopt.org.
My beautiful son.
I told you there was a reason you hadn't heard much from me over the last few months and here is the reason:
I have kept a lot of things quiet because even I didn't completely understand things. When I started the process for MayLing over two years ago, I knew at that time that a son from Vietnam would be part of the package. I just didn't know when or how. My reasoning brain just assumed that it would several years after I got my daughter home. But my heart couldn't let it go and the image of this baby boy that God had placed in my heart grew with each passing day. With the exception of Kristen--no one knew. When I chose my daughter's name, I also chose my son's. When I picked and bought the paint for MayLing's room, I did the same for his. When Kristen and I went shopping for our future daughters, I wandered across the aisle and bought from the boy's side as well.
It was a tough year as I waited and wondered what to do. On November 4, 2007 Kristen called to tell me that the CCAA had just released some changes to their policies--concurrent adoptions and pregnancies were now allowed. It was the sign I needed. Many months before I had picked the agency I wanted to work with so that very same night I emailed the coordinator from that agency and told him I was ready to begin. And begin we did.
I could never have imagined the horrific emotional highs and lows that would follow--something that I had never experienced during the process with my daughter. After months of CIS losing my paperwork and other government screw-ups along the way, I finally had a completed dossier to submit. The day before I was to submit it and pay a substantial portion of my adoption fees a news release was printed that the US and VN were not renegotiating the MOU they had operated under for the previous two years. There would be no more referrals after September 1st.
For the next 4 months I sat and wondered, prayed, and tried to find peace in what seemed like impossible odds. So many families were waiting--some for several years--how could I possible receive a referral?
But in my bones I knew he lived and breathed and even from the other side of world I could feel the weight of him against my chest. I knew the date of his birth and location of birth long before I ever heard of a referral. All along the way I could feel these momentous things occurring somewhere beyond our grasp. It was interesting to receive all his info last week and be able to confirm all these thoughts and feelings along the way. I knew the date of our match long before I was ever told--his paperwork confirms it. So many other things that before I could only feel and assume were important--well, they were.
On September 1st I received an email with this simple message:
You're in.
Your boy is permanently matched to you.
No kidding.
Have a great holiday.
We'll talk during the week, I don't have a clue yet when we'll get the photos, etc.
I waited another two days before I saw his face and then waited nearly four more months before I finally had the chance to hold him.
He is mine and I am his. Together we rang in the New Year just hours after stepping off an airplane together.
This is how proud I am of my cat, I actually took the time to open a YouTube account and waited and waited while the videos loaded. Here she is after the kill--there is no blood and it looks like she is playing with a toy but please DO NOT SHOW TO LITTLE CHILDREN. Ok, I feel better now.
and more video just cuz I am so proud!
The first video is the better one, but she gets a really good mouse toss in with the first 20-30 seconds of the second video. The first video was with my camera and the second was with my camcorder...definitely a difference, but not the one I was expecting! In the first video I had cornered her after she tried to take it to my bedroom...uh huh...not the kind of 'bedroom surprise' I was hoping for! Because she has never shown any interest in killing mice I was a little concerned that it was just stunned so I did touch it just to make sure. And, yes, I did gag a little bit while she kept chewing at it and thumping it against the wall. Ugh.
Ok, the 'bare hands' story is as follows...I bought and moved into my very first house two and a half years ago. It is an older house and had sat vacant for years. A few nights after I moved in I am sitting on the couch watching TV when I notice the cat. She was pawing at the wall, again. To prove to her that nothing was wrong I picked her up, opened the electrical box/utility box on the wall and out scurried a mouse! I was so not ready for that! I dropped the cat over the mouse and yelled, "Get it, Siva!". The poor little mouse was a bit stunned and wasn't moving terribly fast, but the cat sniffed and walked away. Because I have a loooong and somewhat unfortunate history with mice I was not about to let it run away and procreate. I didn't have a shoe or slipper (and trust me, I would have pounded it into pancakes if I'd had one) so I grabbed this fleece bed that my cat sleeps on, covered the mouse and cupped it to contain it. Well, when you live alone and you can't yell for someone to grab a jar your choices are limited and a piece of cloth is not going to contain a mouse. So, I squished it. It was awful! I started applying pressure and I swear to you the mouse started squealing and when I started feeling things pop I got too nauseated and let go. I was too horrified to do anymore and the poor mouse did stagger away. Without going into any more horrifying details I can confirm that the mouse did die. Ugh, it was awful! I was so upset--I called my best friend, but I think he was slightly amused by it. Even thinking back on it disturbs me.
I actually have another doozy of a mouse/mice story, but I am going to wait until tomorrow. It's kind of funny and I need to end on a funny note after remembering the details of my kill.
Oh, the cats name is Siva, but is pronounced like Shiva. I named her after the Indian deity of destruction. It just seemed appropriate.
You should know that Sarah Palin had just pardoned a turkey 20 seconds before the cameras started rolling. And in case you aren't clear on the concept, the guy behind her is KILLING the surviving turkeys. Yep, I can't make this crap up.
Part of my trivia from the early part of this week was about El Paso...Illinois. What makes El Paso significant? Well, I pass through it every time I visit Kristen and this weekend I took a very special trip to Wisconsin. After two years of waiting, Kristen was finally going to China to pick up her daughter!
We started our journeys as strangers over two years ago when we were both accepted into the China program at the same agency. I still consider that a miracle because NONE of the other agencies I contacted allowed singles and only two days before I applied I was told that they would NOT be opening their doors to singles again because of the rumored single exclusion. We competed (I hate to use that word, but there were only a few slots available) against a number of other single applicants and we were accepted the same day. I wasn't aware of Kristen until she posted that she was DTC--up until then I had been in the lead, but being the good sport that I am I emailed my congrats and our friendship began from there. Even though we live several states away we manage to see each other several times a year and talk and email constantly. Yeah, it's one of those really cool friendships. We have so much in common it would have been a real shame to have never met.
Today she left for China and while I write she is still in flight with an expected touch down somewhere in the wee hours of the morning--or early morning depending on how you define your sleeping hours. So, Friday I happily drove up to WI to celebrate Cate's arrival with her friends and family with a toddler shower. Let me tell you, that girl got some loot! It was all I could do to stay out of her toys! Hopefully Kris won't mind me posting this photo because her daughter is absolutely stunning! 
Feel free to stop by her blog and say "hey". Her brother is supposed to be keeping up with posts while she is gone. I'm already restless--I can't wait to meet me newest little niece!
Do you ever have one of those days when nearly everything you hear or see gives you pause? Seriously, I has to be a full moon or darn near. Now that I am the only analyst I have been getting these calls: "so are you now involved with project xyz? Must be you since you are the only one left." or "I didn't see you at the project meeting for abc...did you forget?" NO, I didn't forget. I haven't been assigned and I am not volunteering--I finally told someone today "I can't carry anymore weight. You are going to have to wait."
I work with really nice people, emphasis on nice. But some of their phone calls are making me freakin' insane. There are a couple of them that like to call, but aren't prepared to discuss the subject they are calling me on. I am doing a favor for them and they don't have the courtesy to cut the shit and get to the point. Honestly, one called me today and couldn't remember what she called me about or what she needed. I kept telling her "just call me back when you are ready" but she was smart enough to know that I had NO intention of picking up that phone again! So while she fiddle farted around trying to remember what she needed to tell me I actually put the phone down and used the bathroom. Yep, I'm getting tired and I am really, really looking forward to my LOOONG vacation.
Which is why I found this picture so funny tonight:
The quality isn't good since I took it with my cell phone, but it was funny enough that I actually blew the 10 cents to send it to my email, my sister's phone and my brother-in-law's phone. It is your everyday "economy" sedan with a WOODEN rear spoiler. No kidding--I laughed my toots off when that kid pulled up. Not only that, it is nailed into the trunk. It is a couple of 2x4s nailed together and although you can't see it, the stamp from the lumber company is still on the wood. He even drilled a number of holes in it--I imagine it's to decrease the amount of wind resistance and drag on the car. The kid didn't even paint it! He also had a racing stripe down the front of the car, but it appeared to be a peel off or a very sloppy home paint job. I wonder if he made this in shop class....?
Yes, I know I have been neglecting this blog. There is a reason, and it is a pretty darn good reason.
In about a month from now my life is going to get pretty crazy. And believe it or not, I fully intend to drag you down with me. Why keep the crazy fun to myself?!? Stay tuned for more details (or directions...hard so say where I am going to land).
And for a change of subject...what is with all the people suddenly buying guns post-Obama election? Really, you think you need an automatic weapon to hunt with? Are you serious? I believe in our amendment rights, but I honestly don't see the sport in buying/selling weapons whose sole purpose is to kill people. I totally support hunting (ok, not really, but people have to eat and I'm too much of a weenie to kill my own meat. I can't even touch the raw, nicely packaged chicken I buy from the market--the texture totally weirds me out. I'd probably be a vegasaurus if I had to kill my own food) so I would not advocate taking guns from people. If you don't know what I'm talking about click here. Obama never said he was going to take away our right to bear arms, but if city dwellers think they need an Uzi to take down a deer--well, they obviously aren't hunting for the meat or the pelt. These types of weapons were designed for warfare, not for home protection or sport. And what is wrong with requiring a background check? I work as a nurse and it is frightening the number of crazies that walk among us. Some of them even sound normal some days (this is not a slam against people with mental illness; I'm just saying that some people aren't safe with dull butter knives). Or what about the guy down the road that was released from prison after only serving two years for manslaughter? Don't the rest of us deserve the right to be safe?
Since it is an amendment right I can't see how Obama (or any other politician) will ever take our guns away, so why are all these people stockpiling?
I'm not actually lactose intolerant, but I do have an allergy to a protein that is found in milk and other dairy products. Nevertheless, the effect is basically the same. Since arriving in Dallas they have fed me nothing but cheese. Cheese with a side of lettuce, cheese with a side of enchiladas, cheese with a side of eggs...you get the picture and I am in hell. Yesterday afternoon I was in so much pain that I could barely stand or sit upright. It doesn't end there, as I am sure you are aware. There is cramping, distended abdomen, really strange noises coming from my mid-section (I said mid-section, not butt although it does eventually get there too). Today I rushed from the lunch room (cheese with a side of chicken) feeling quite nauseous. Let's just say I spent a good portion of my break in there.
It isn't always this bad. Since it is an allergy, the severity of my symptoms tends to depend on how many other allergens are also attacking me. In the summer I can have a hamburger with little or no problems, but in the fall and in January (with the higher mold counts) I develop amnesia until it rips my gut up.
Ok, change of subject. About 2 weeks ago I learned that I am finally through the review room. Yay! I know it doesn't sound like such a big deal after I have already been waiting this long (20 months on Sunday!), but for me it was. They could have been nit-picky and asked for more medical documentation. It would have been easy to get since I am healthy, but I didn't want to get pulled out of my LID queue.
Kristen reminded me yesterday of what yesterday's date was. Honestly, I'm not sure how I forgot it since it has really been on my mind alot in the week leading up to it. October 4, 2006 was the day my agency's website posted that they had a limited number of single slots available. If you look back through my blog towards the beginning you will what a miracle that was (not for them, but for me). Two days prior to that I had called inquiring about a spot and the director of the China program told me it wasn't going to happen because they knew China was getting ready to disqualify singles (did I just make up a Bushism? Not sure that is the correct use of that word). I could have written them off, but two days later I felt God urging me to go back. Up until this point I had not decided to start the process--I wanted to wait a year since I was flat broke. On October 4th, the nudge God had placed on my heart the month before suddenly became a very annoying rap on the head "do it, do it, do it!". Thankfully, I listened and checked the website. On October 6th, they called to tell me they had received my packet, but they had questions about whether I was be accepted by the CCAA. They didn't want to waste a slot on someone who wouldn't pass muster. After a very long weekend, my agency called me to say I was approved to begin the process and to GET ON IT!
Even though the wait has been long and my journey has taken some twists and turns, I never lose the absolute wonderment over God's perfect timing. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I had not heeded God's suggestion and I shudder to think of it. Even though my daughter is not yet home, she (or the thought of her) has opened my heart and world in ways nothing has before. She has changed the very course of my life and that is an amazing thing.
I love you, baby girl!
Clay Aiken announced today that he is gay. Really? Gay? Had no one picked up on this before? 
He reported that he made the decision to come out after deciding he didn't want his son to think lying was ok. Good for him! I can't imagine how hard it is to live life with a huge secret hanging over your head. Lucky for him, I think most people already know.
Unfortunately, all the rabid Claymates may need to find someone else to throw their undies at. I'm sure Clay will be relieved.
I took today off from work so I could sleep. Truly, I am that tired and overworked. Would you like to guess what woke me up at 11:07 am? Not the cat (although she had been obnoxious), not the lawn mower down the road--it was a low flying plane. Yep, I seriously grabbed the cat and hit the deck and said, "oh, sh**!". Yeah, my sister and I have had the conversation that nearly every time I encounter something life defying that my response is "oh sh*t!". I'm not proud, I truly am not. I'm afraid one of these times it is going to be the big one and the last words I utter before encountering the pearly gates is going to be "oh sh*t". Hopefully God has a sense of humor.
The other weirdo moment happened last night. I HATE receiving advertisements from credit card companies, I hate that they sell my personal information to other vendors so that THEY can also harass me. So when I saw the opt-out insert they tucked behind my last bill, I wanted to make a point of calling. When I called a husky voiced from a wo/man (not too sure, folks) answered. When I told him/her what I wanted s/he asked why I called this number. Considering I had just given her my credit card number I started getting very nervous, especially since this is on the heels of the PayPal Fiasco of my birthday (someone stole my account and bought an Audi car). I explained that the number I called was the number that was provided. So s/he was chatty and was asking about if I had been affected by Hurricane Ike. It seems kind of stupid to even admit it since I live in Indiana, but yeah, we got hit kind of hard. Besides Texas, we were the next state with the highest number of lives lost due to the storm. S/he asks about the storm twice (what the heck?). Then she finishes my transaction. I asked her what I needed to do since I am planning on going overseas in a couple of months. She then starts telling me to take Immodium because of the food. Honestly, I've eaten some foods both here and abroad that I'm not proud of. The last thing I want to do is sssllllooooww their exit out of me. You understand?
At this point s/he realizes I'm a nurse and starts telling me about her cheating ex-husband. She says since you are a nurse you will understand this, "I started dosing him with spironolactalone and an anti-psychotic and he was not the same after that."
Ok, does that scare you at all? Honestly, it did me. I didn't even know some of the effects of spironolactalone until recently (among other things it suppresses testosterone) but having some fruit loop on the phone admit to poisoning someone, well, that's just not right. That reminds me, I probably need to check my credit again...
Yep, it is truly a neglected blog and for that I am sorry. I think the hard part is having so much going on in my life, but so little that I can publicly share in a worldwide forum such as this one. So, I choose not to talk at all. If it makes you feel better, I actually do the same things to my friends (how sad that I shut them out when I can't share things).
Unfortunately I don't have adoption news to share. Most of what I am dealing with is work related stress and given my current job and the tech people I work with, I realize it is not wise to unload those things here. I guess I am actually getting wiser the older I get. A few weeks ago a colleague asking my opinion on something and as I opened my mouth to speak (realizing at that moment that my opinion would likely not be in the majority and therefore it was open to attack) I shut it and said "never mind". That actually speaks just as loudly, but now I don't leave a verbal trail that might hang me later.
There is some good news in adoption land though, the CCAA is finally matching families and children in February 2006. Whoo hoo! Right now I'm a year and 3 days behind where they currently are. That feels better than where I was sitting six months ago!
The birthday did suck a bit, but I'm a big girl, I can handle it. My friends made up for the other shortcomings and I couldn't believe some of the awesome gifts I got. Plus, my sister bought me the last two books of the Twilight series and I am dying to dig into them (did you get the joke on that one?)! I'm actually re-reading the first one right now and I'm going to take book 3 with me tomorrow as I head out to Georgia for training. Please say a prayer that I don't have too many problems from the hurricanes.
I needed to take a bit of a blogger break. Nothing was really on my mind, which was exactly the reason I needed a break. Very little is happening in adoption land and my personal life has become rather boring so I decided to take some time off.
I did celebrate my 18 month LID last Tuesday. Honestly, it's hard to believe it has been that long already. Currently the wait is now 30.5 months for a referral, so as you can see, I still have a ways to go! That's ok; I'm patient. It will be interesting to see what happens after the Olympics. I don't believe that the flood gates will open per se, but I do believe that we might see a few more referrals or LIDs trickle through in the coming months and hopefully next year we will actually see things improve. 
I have been working a lot of overtime at work--and evenings--and weekends--and on-call. I don't like it, but it is only temporary and I remind myself that the money goes right into my baby fund. I was scheduled to come off on call this morning at 7 am, but I woke up at 6:48 and decided to pop the battery out 12 minutes earlier (yes, it's easier to pop the battery out than figure out how to turn it off).
My birthday is in less than two weeks and I'm looking forward to spending some time with my family. This time of year is my favorite in this city and my favorite festival of the year is being held on my B-day this year. How special am I?
I've had an ass-kickin', lip smackin' good day. Warning the following post may contain words not suitable for children under the age of 13.
I was in a meeting this morning with some colleagues when my boss blows in with steam coming out of her ears. Her voice was slightly below a yell and she was obviously pissed. She said, "I was just on the new unit and I can't get the main desk computer to work." I just kind of looked at her dumbfounded--of course the computer doesn't work, it's not fully installed.
She was still mad and asked why I hadn't already tested the devices (our term for the the multitude of PCs, laptops, tablets, printers, PDAs, and other handheld devices) last week. Simple answer. Because until last night/early this morning they hadn't been installed. She couldn't understand how the installing department hadn't been able to put them in when it should have been done last Wednesday. Another simple answer: because the contractors were still working yesterday. Honestly, how do you install computers when you don't even have countertops to put them on or jacks or power outlets? The construction guys were literally painting around me today as I worked. I'm half stupid from inhaling all the fumes and killing my brain cells.
I explained all this to her, but she was not appeased. She didn't like being kept out of the loop--I tried to gently remind her that I asked her on Monday if the unit was going to be ready considering it didn't even have a functioning toilet. After she left, I proceeded to print out all the e-mails over the past week concerning the delays. Every email I started began with "are the printers set up yet?"
Despite her attempt smooth her over-reaction (apologies aren't really necessary in the work force, don't you agree?), I was already on way to being a crankysaurus. Granted, I tend to be funny when I'm cranky, but only because I'm mean. Just last week our secretary turned to me and said, "You're short, but you're mean". I guess you aren't supposed to be both.
Fortunately I genuinely like the people I work with. Honestly, most of us are good natured and are cognizant of the fact that we are going to get tossed into the rubbage heap and we have to work as a team to get the hell out. Kind of like that scene from Star Wars when Luke, Han Solo (ahh, Harrison Ford) and Princess Leia are stuck in trash compactor with the weird snake lurking under the garbage water. They yelled at each other the whole time, but they managed to get out together. I think. It's been years since I've seen it.
Anyway, by 5 PM I'm getting pretty hungry and that 15 minute snarf session 6 hours prior is a distant memory. By 6 PM I'm down right snarly and each time I have to test print a Word document it says something like let me out of here, do you hate me or something, how come I am still here when everyone else got to leave? Evidently when you educate yourself on multiple applications you became that girl, Ms. Popular. At this point I know I can say pretty much anything to anyone and they can't say a word about it because I don't have a replacement.
At 7:15 PM I finally announce that I am leaving. I walk back to my building and wouldn't you know it, it is locked up tight. I'd like to say I didn't use any "language", but then I'd be lying. I walked back over and decided that after all the assistance I have given the Help Desk they had better loan me their spare key. The last time I got locked out I had to call security and it wasn't pretty. After waiting 20 impossibly long minutes the security guard walks over, unlocks my door, opens it for me, proceeds to follow me and locks the door behind us. I kid you not. I thought I was about to be raped. He then asked (gag) "is there anything else I can help open?" Yeah, you can open an incident report and save me the trouble of reporting you. Gross. So not really a fan of calling security and getting stuck with Officer Sicko.
It's just been one of those days after a series of one of those days. So what do I do when I am stressed and should either be walking it off or sleeping it off? I started cooking and baking. At 9:30 at night. I must be crazy, but at least I should have a lot of extra food to stock my freezer with. At the rate I'm going I shouldn't have to work very long on Friday--actually, I may be home by 9 am because I have run out of hours!
I woke up this morning with a hickey and realized two things:
Close inspection revealed the hickey exactly matched the jade necklace that I wear every day right down to the gold inlayed message. I wasn't sure whether I was relieved that I hadn't been molested by an alien in the middle of the night...or a little disappointed.
(I'm not really lonely, I just noticed the hickey this morning and thought it was kind of funny. I was talking to Sarah yesterday right before I walked into the Chinese restaurant and realized that some of my behaviors are very lonely/single girl behaviors. Then tonight I went to Kroger and got one of the basket...and a big box of cat litter. Oy, I'm the very stereotype of a single girl.)
to Chinese food. I'm starting to get embarrassed because I am now visiting my local establishment about once a week. Perhaps I shouldn't be embarrassed, but I get tired of pretending to actually browse the take-out menu when I have absolutely no intention of even trying most of those foods. It's not that I think I won't like it and it's that I am afraid of it (puh-leeze, I've eaten chicken's feet prepared every possibly way in Hong Kong in addition to duck's tongue, duck's brain and an assortment of other unidentified foods I'd rather not know about. I'm not gustatorily shy), but for $8 a pop I want to have the most enjoyment out of every meal I buy so that means buying what I really, really like.
For the longest time I celebrated my Friday nights going to an east-side establishment because they most resembled the HK style noodles I have grown to love. For some reason it has become my comfort food and by Friday nights, baby, I need some comfort. But after a little Chinese restaurant opened less than 2 miles from my home with a similar style of food I began frequenting it. A couple of weeks a go I was slightly embarrassed by the frequency of my visits so I attempted the east side only to learn they were under renovation. I swallowed my pride and returned to the neighborhood place.
Has it been 10 minutes yet? I think my order is ready. I'll talk to ya'll later.
